Better late than never, part 3

Yes, it is true I have wanted to marry Keri since 1995. Imagine loving someone with all of your heart for 18 years and wanting, just like everyone else to get married, but you couldn't, because some stupid law reads, one man one woman. It was awful! Funny how awful is only one letter away from lawful.

Since we've been together, Keri and I have attending weddings of couples that don't even exist anymore and at one point we put a moratorium on attending weddings. We felt as long as we were not allowed to marry, we would not attend the celebration of others that could. It was hard, ya know? To see other people getting to do what we so badly wanted and couldn't have. The moratorium was an act of self-preservation, or so it felt.

It didn't last long because we got an invitation to Keri's sister's wedding and there wasn't a chance in hell I was going pass on that, just to prove a point. Keri's sister, Kirsten, said at the reception of their ceremony that she felt it wasn't fair for her and her husband to be getting married when her sister who had been together with her partner for so many years wasn't able to. I thought it was sweet of her to acknowledge our relationship.

Keri and I actually bought rings back in 97 and agreed that we wouldn't wear them until we had a ceremony. Before we could even got to the car we had already decided to say fuck it and wear our new rings, because when were we going to be able to have a ceremony.

Then in 2002 we, I should say I, started to plan a ceremony and I keep calling it a ceremony because it wouldn't have actually been a marriage, because there are still some people around that think a marriage can only be between a man and a woman. I wanted a wedding, a ceremony or whatever you want to call a party where we get together with all our closest people and publicly declare our love for one another. Keri back then agreed to do what I wanted to do but, she definitely was totally fine skipping that part all together.

Not to say at all, that she didn't love me, she is hopelessly, madly, truly and deeply in LOVE. :) In case you are reading this and don't know Keri, I have to tell you that she is the practical one. She would say and has said, why go to all the trouble and expense of it, if it isn't going to mean anything legally. She also said, I want you to be happy and if want a ceremony and you plan it, I will be there.

So, I started planning. I looked into catering, venue, music, flowers, dresses (maybe not dresses back then), but quickly realized the cost of this "ceremony" was quite a bit more than I thought and that is when we decided to buy a house.

I did make more sense to put all of that money toward something that would benefit us. She did have a very valid point. I just wanted to be married to my baby that's all and guess what! I am now happily and legally married. It is an amazing feeling!

Married ✔️

Better late than never, part 2

It was about three and a half weeks ago that Keri surprised me with the spontaneous proposal. I could not contain my happiness and overall excitement because we have been wanting to get married since 1995 and we really never thought that we would be able to in our life time. We thought that Oregon might come around in 2014 and allow same sex marriage. So, about 4 months ago we started planning a ceremony for 2015 (the year of our 20 year anniversary), so there has been a great deal of conversation on the subject lately, but to suggest that we do it now, was very exciting and honestly, after the initial excitement a little disappointing too.

Exciting, because we HAVE been wanting this for so long and were not allowed. Yes, that is what I said, Not Allowed, but now that it is legal, in selective states, we didn't want to wait a moment longer. The disappointing part was that I really wanted all the things we have been talking about over the last several months. I was torn!

I was upset and emotional. It was confusing because I was also very excited. Keri was very sweet and supportive. She offered to wait until 2015, but said just because we go up to the courthouse in Seattle, doesn't mean we won't still have the event we've been planning. She said the most important thing to her was my happiness and she didn't want me to have another wedding experience that I'd look back on and regret. She knows how important the event of a wedding is to me and despite her uncomfortable feelings regarding being the center of attention, she has agreed to step outside of her comfort zone for me. What a sweet heart she is and me, well, I have promised to hog the spotlight.

Better late than never, part 1

You know how sometimes your feelings are so overwhelmingly wonderful that all you can do is hold your hands up, shrug your shoulders and say, I have no words, while the tears are rolling down your face?

Maybe you do and maybe you don't ,... Well, let me tell you what happen to me this weekend.

I had the most wonderful and joyous experience of finally AND legally marrying the love of my life.

It. Was. Amazing!

I've been married before and neither time before did I experience the happiness, giddiness, and depth of love I felt this time. I believe with ALL my heart that this time, I got it right!

I just can't hide it,...

I am so excited I just can not take it anymore. So, here it goes.

The other day I posted this comment on my Facebook: hmmm,... I think it's time to buy a dress. If you asked "a dress or THE dress" good intuition!!! (Winky face)

It's hard not to just jump right in and blurt it all out, but I really want you to get a feel for what actually went down. So, I'll start at, kinda, the beginning.

Last week I received a letter from our beloved IRS notifying me that I, Angel Zamudio, owed them about $2000, because I claimed the interest on our house in 2011 and they didn't have any documentation to support that claim, therefore, I owe them money, in their opinion.

My name, as well as Keri's name, is on the mortgage and always has been. We have alternated who claims the interest on the house before and it wasn't a problem. We always file separate and single because, although we have raised a son together, have had joint checking and savings accounts for 18 years, bought and paid for, in full, a couple cars, opened a new business and sold it for a profit and adopted a very handsome golden retriever, ALL TOGETHER, mind you, we are not able to marry one another in our home state of Oregon! Bull shit!!! Yes! I know!

Well, don't you worry your pretty little heads one bit about this because we have supporting documentation to substantiate my claim and a letter to the IRS including that information is already on it way! So there! Hmph!

Here's where it gets exciting. Once I notified Keri, via text, that all the documents had been signed, dated, copied and mailed, she shot back a question. Hey, how do you feel about taking a little jaunt up to Washington state and making this thing legal? My heart started pounding. I made a little squeal and shook my open hands around in utter delight. I responded, Are you asking me to marry you? As I waited for her to respond and because I knew that's exactly what she was doing, I was already typing my response, YES! A thousand times yes!

The excitement totally blew me away. Here is my baby, such the planner that she is, spontaneously purposing that we run off and get married. I couldn't believe it!!! Ohhh the excitement!!! When? Are we talkin' Vantucky? (Vantucky is what we jokingly call Vancouver.) No! Not Vancouver, SEATTLE!!! Whoop whoop!!!

Hold it now!!! Wait one stinkin' minute!!! What about the wedding we were planning in 2015? All the fun, party, family and friends, singing, dancing and all that stuff? What about that stuff? She knows I would not just give up on all that dreamy stuff a girl loves! Nope! She said we'll still do that, this is just a technicality, so we can start getting the benefits of a married couple.

I am so excited to be excited about getting married!!! I guess the third time IS a charm. More on that later. The totally awesome thing about it, besides all the other totally awesome things about it, is that on October 17th the Human Rights Campaign posted a comment of their blog announcing that "Oregon will now recognize all out-of-state marriages, including those of same-sex couples". Woo hoo!!!!

[caption id="" align="alignleft" width="224"] License in the mail, after 18 years, better late than never.[/caption]

So, you can see now why I'm so excited. I will legally be married to the woman I have lived my life with, grown with, loved with, vacationed with, planned retirement with, raised a son with, bought a house with, trained and raise a handsome golden retriever with, cried and laughed with, supported each other through loss, developed our family, cultivated friendships and all the other things a married couple would do together. We have done those things and now, NOW we will be a legally married couple. Tears of joy roll down my face as this next thought popped into my mind. I can finally check the married box. It may seem silly to some, but I have been begrudgingly checking that single box for the last 18 years and it is monumental to me to have this basic right.

Wife and wife.