After the Call and After the Beep

Perhaps I am missing something, so I am going to write about it here in my blog and see if any of my readers can shed some light on this for me. Usually what happens when I write about something that doesn't make sense to me is by the time I finish writting I've come to terms with the confusing thing and I just let it go. This time I'm not sure, we'll see,...

So what I don't understand is why do some people answer their cell phones when they're "not available". I call people just about everyday to remind them of appointments or to follow up with questions or answers and I just can not figure out why some people answer their phones when they are at work and in a meeting, or in their classroom. When they answer, they say, "I am in a meeting/class can you call back and leave me a message?"

Well, I would have left a message had you not answered. I would assume you were not available and I would have left a message. I promise. Maybe I should just clarify that the invention of voice mail is so that you can allow people to leave you a message when you're not available. You don't have to answer. That is how it works.

Now that you have answered to tell me you're not available and want me to call back to leave a message, I have to make another call?!? Just don't answer when you're not available. I might not mention this if I didn't have such a busy day, but I am only one person. I am trying to work smarter not harder.

I didn't come to terms with it. I still find it aggrevating. So where's the positive attitude here today Angel? Well, I'm just not sure. Maybe my positive attitude is not available right now, why don't you call me back later. LOL.

That's right, I said, Suck it!!!

You know what? One of these days I am going to learn that positivity isn't for everyone and those folks that don't dig positivity can suck it!!!!

Really it should not matter to me if someone else likes positivity or not. Right? Do I give a shit if someone else wants to be miserable? Does someone else being miserable affect my level of joy? Only if,...wait for it,

I. Allow. It.

Frankly folks, I am TIRED of giving my power away. Should I temper my level of joy because someone else chooses to be miserable? The answer my friend is blowing in the wind and the wind is saying, Hell NO!!!! I am holding on to my power because giving away my personal power is like leaving a light on in a room when you leave it empty. No one is using that light and it's a waste of energy. Have you ever tried to bolster someone up that is dead set on having a pity party? Waste of energy. Another reason is because it doesn't matter how full of positive energy I have or harness, honestly, I could very possibly be the very most positive person I know and it doesn't matter if I were the most positive person in the Universe a positive attitude is NOT something you can gift someone, even if you have an abundance of positivity.

Having a positive attitude is a choice and you can not make someone else choose. You can only choose for yourself.

I choose positivity and I allow others to be whatever they choose to be. It really is that easy. The reason it is that easy is because a belief is a thought that you keep thinking and your brain is very very powerful. Think of the things that you have convinced your self of,...

Why not keep thinking something that serves you well?

I choose positivity and I allow others to be whatever they choose to be without allowing it to affect my level of joy.

Not for wussies,...

OK, divine guidance I am open to receiving your message of clarity. I have been walking around in the dark with my arms extended to feel my way around and I am ready to see some light. I end up getting hurt when I walk around in the dark. I bump into things, get knocked in the shin, stub my toe, bump my head and it makes me cry. I am tired of getting hurt.

I take in a deep breath, close my eyes, let out the deep breath and take another. I open my heart and allow your clarity to flow through me. I am lost and I do not know what to do. I just read a comment on a website called praying women that read when someone feels anger it is a defense mechanism against feeling hurt and at this very moment I can totally identify with that feeling.

I wrote a scathing message to someone about 20 minutes ago with questionable intent. Will I send this message out to this person? Will this angry message benefit the situation? Will it reach the intended person and create the situation I desire? It is quite clear to me now that the answer is no, but that does not mean I know what to do. So, I am asking. I am asking for clarity and I am open to whatever message it is that I receive.

I know that a great deal of what I end up writing about is allowing others to be whatever it is they need to be, but I am confused about my feelings. It feels like allowing this person to be what it is they feel they need to be is hurting me. Damn clarity!! Just as I was typing that, divine clarity, spoke and said, It is hurting you because you are allowing it to hurt you. You can choose to let it go. It feels like when I am letting go that I am allowing someone slip through my fingers into non existence and that makes me very sad. It makes me cry. How long do I let go? Do I just let go forever?



OK, the anger is gone and has been replaced by sadness. I do not want to loose this person. The sadness hurts. It feels like my heart is breaking. I can't stop crying. What would I say to me if I was a friend of mine in this situation? I would say, Does it make you feel good to think about this? No. Is there anything regarding this subject that brings you joy? Not this particular aspect, no. Is there any aspect of this subject that brings you joy? Yes! OK. Do you like to feel this sadness? No. OK, then wipe those tears from your eyes and focus on what brings you joy. Life is too short to sit around crying about things that you can not change. It is what it is, if there is something else you can focus on that makes you feel better then I say do it!!! And do it now, before you waste one more precious second of your life feeling sad.

OK, feeling better. Thank you. You're welcome.

To judge or share, which is it?

What's the difference between passing judgement and sharing my opinion? Excellent question my friend! I don't really know the answer to that question, that is why I am asking. Let's look into it a little bit.

I just googled "pass judgement" and the free dictionary online defined it as forming a critical opinion. Personally, the word critical has a negative connotation. So, I guess if you are sharing an opinion that is critical of another then it crosses the line of being judgmental. Just for shits and giggles I requested a definition for critical, because I was wondering if it could be a positive thing. When I looked a little further into the definition I found it also means having decisive or crucial importance in the success or failure of something. That sounds like a positive thing, because I choose to focus on the positive and I hear success. This triggers a memory for me about working in a dental lab. I'll write more on that later, because I really want to continue investigating the difference between passing judgment and sharing my opinion.

After reading several articles and quotes on sharing my opinion it seems far less important to differentiate between sharing an opinion and being judgmental. It seems to be of a much greater importance to focus on allowing others to be. It must be true because I keep finding myself standing right I front of the same realization time after time.

Passing judgment on others does not make me feel better and sharing my opinion,...well, what the hell difference does it make? I have my opinion and you have yours. Does sharing my opinion with you change your opinion? Maybe,...sometimes, but really only if you are open to it. There really is no sense in arguing, unless one of us is open to and willing to change. I am open to having a conversation, but I don't want to argue. For the sake of this blog and my original question, I believe I have come to the conclusion that sharing an opinion can be beneficial as long as both parties are open to a conversation and passing judgment depends on the intention of the person passing the judgment. Is it well intended? Is it of crucial importance in aiding to the success of an endeavor of another? Is the other person open to hearing? Are you willing to share in an effort to help someone out? Are you open to them not giving a shit about your opinion? Are you open to the idea that they might love your idea, but aren't willing to do anything to improve their behavior?

If you find your self feeling negative feelings while observing something that you are not willing to work out and want to LET GO of the negative feelings, simply start now.

Let it go and start now.