Everything's gonna be alright

You know that moment when you are right in the middle of a panic and you can't feel your feet?

It's sorta like your breathing gets to going so rapidly, the circulation to your extremities slows to a point of no feeling. You almost have this feeling that everything is going to be ok, if only this one thing would just work out.

I had this feeling a couple weeks ago at the grocery store. I had recently gotten a new wallet for my purse, so I had reorganized everything in a way that seemed to make sense at the time, but once I was standing in the check out line all that sense went right out the window.

I was frantically looking for my debit card to pay for my groceries and I KNEW that it was in there somewhere, I just could not find it. The panic feeling was not helping me find it, so I took a few deep breaths and told myself, it will be just fine. You know your debit card is in here somewhere. The deep breaths helped me feel my feet again and what do you know I was able to find my debit card.

It was in a place that seemed totally logical. What do you know? I'm not crazy after all. The cashier was totally identifying with me and she was the one that mentioned the feeling of not bring able to feel her feet. It was spot on and as soon as she said that my awareness shifted and that is when I started taking the deep breaths and I calmed down.

It's amazing sometimes how the very simple words of one person can have such a profound affect on someone else and that concept right there is the main reason why I write this blog.

I want people to be aware that they have the power to change their lives. I want people to know that they can choose a more peaceful life. I want people to feel all the love there is to feel around them and more importantly within them. I want people to feel empowered. Don't get me wrong I benefit a great deal from all the writing and introspective work I do for this blog. This blog provides for me a huge sense of empowerment. All the things I write about are really a higher wisdom in myself that I allow to flow through me and I am learning as I am writing. In fact, I am a subscriber to my own blog.

When I write about something, the post usually goes out a few days later and sometimes even as much as a couple weeks later. So, time passes and with experience even just a couple of days worth of experiences my perspective changes. When I get up in the morning, the very first thing I do is, I read my blog. I surprise myself sometimes. I wonder where the hell did that clarity come from and I guess the answer is, from a higher wisdom.

A wisdom that knows beyond a shadow of a doubt that everything is going to be ok, even if for a moment I can't feel my feet. It will all be ok.

Pretty damn good advice

Why do self defeating thoughts permeate my mind? I doubt sometimes, that I am good enough. I have wondered if my work ethic is strong enough and what kind of friend am I? I've doubted the quality of my parenting and whether or not I am a good partner. I know I am loved and I know that I try to do what I think is "right" in any given moment, but somehow these negative thoughts continue to run through my mind.

So, if I know that I am loved and I know that I am always trying my best, why am I so hard on myself? Why are any of us so damned hard on ourselves? Why do we have these irrational self deprecating thoughts? Well, I'll tell you, I do not know the answer to that question. What I do know is, that old thoughts can be replaced by new ones and with practice we can change these negative thoughts into ones of positive empowerment. Therefore, I am committing myself right here and right now to a vow.

Henceforth, I vow to allow my self-defeating thoughts to serve as a reminder to myself that I am doing my best and my best will not always be the same because there will always be variables, but the fact is that I will be doing my best. I will be patient, loving, and encouraging with myself. I will recommit myself to this vow as often as needed. I will treat myself as well as I treat others. I will take my own advice. Advice, that I've been told is pretty damn good.

I am a good friend. I'm a damn good friend and a damn good partner too. So, I intend to be as good to myself as I am to others. It's only fair that I be a damn good self to myself.

Imagine, if it is true (and it is) that the main thing holding us back from the very next amazing thing is the self imposed limit that we create for ourselves right in our very own minds. Amazing!!! Right? You mean I can change my mind and change my reality? Yes! That is exactly what I am saying it you. And yes, I am saying it to me too, because as the saying goes, whether you think you can or can not, you are right.