WHAT? No beer???

One of my favorite things in the whole wide world is when some one starts talking about a particular challenge in their life and they are totally ready to be inspired. You can totally tell when someone is ready to be inspired because every encouraging thing you say to them makes perfect sense to them and they are nodding in agreement the whole time you're talking to them.

I encountered this delightful situation this last week when one of my friends and co-workers started talking to me about starting a new eating regimen for the purpose of reversing her lactose intolerance. I can not speak to the validity of this cleanse because I've not done any research on the subject, but what I can speak to is this young woman's enthusiasm for making a positive change in her life.

Her name is Courtney and she is the one that has done the research. She is the one that has decided to make a change in her life. She was talking to me about the restrictions she has decided to place on herself in an effort to reverse her intolerance and was sharing some of the details. The next 5 months (starting after Christmas) she will cut out breads, sugars (even natural sugars (so no fruit), no beer or wine, and honestly, I don't remember all the details, because once she said, "No Beer", I kinda went into shock.

I'm kidding about the shock, but serious that I don't remember all the details. Once Courtney mentioned how hard it was going to be, I shifted into inspiration mode. I said, "It will be as hard or as easy as you decide to make it on yourself". She agreed and came back with, "That's right and if I don't ever do it. I'll be lactose intolerant for the rest of my life".

Yes, that's right. As long as we remain unwilling to make a shift, we can only hold ourselves in place of responsibility for the circumstances that exists in our lives.

We talked about situations that are out of our control, such as people bringing treats to the office. I told her about when I had a clarifying moment a few years ago. Some very sweet well intended person brought some yummy goodies to the office and I said to myself, "Who's the son of a bitch that keeps bringing in the goodies?" and then as if divine wisdom was whispering in my ear, this question came to me, "Well, who's the son of a bitch that keeps putting it in your mouth?"

Ahhh HA!!!

It was really a very cool conversation. I am very excited for Courtney and the change that she is planning to make for herself. 5 months really is not that long at all. I believe in you. I am not saying there won't be challenging moments, but with the right mind set it's going to be much easier. It's all about choices and how much you really want the change you are seeking. You have control over yourself, your thoughts and your actions.

I believe with the right attitude and desire any one of us could make any change we desire for our lives. We all have the power to make it as easy as we'd like for it to be.

Freedom Project

The other day I was on my way to work and this soothing reassuring feeling came over me and the words that ran through my mind went like this, "Today is full of opportunities. Every opportunity that I'm faced with today has two options. One that supports my intention to feel good and one that doesn't. Today it is my intention to choose the best feeling thought, action or response that assists me with my long term alignment."

I practice everyday placing purposeful intention towards the best feeling situation, because I know that like energy attracts like energy. I want the best of the best that life has to offer. I'm not perfect and I have my trips and slips, but with practice the recovery time is much shorter than it used to be. This pleases me.

I wanted to share an amazing conversation I had the opportunity to participate in other day. I was chatting on the phone and a friend of mine was telling me that she was going through a divorce. I asked her how she was doing and she laughed a bit and said, "I am just enjoying the process of my freedom project".

I asked her if it was ok for me to share this in my blog because I really liked the perspective she was choosing. Divorce is difficult in the best of circumstances, but to be seeing this event in her life as a "Freedom Project" was very moving and yet another perfect example of making a choice to place purposeful intention towards the best feeling thing in that situation.

What ever the question, LOVE is the answer. Weather it is self love or love for another, love will always feel good.

There are NO Wrong Answers

I really have been wanting to write about expansion. Why? Well, because I really have been enjoying the feeling of expansion. What do I mean by expansion? Most recently what I mean is the feeling of being sad and getting beyond it. It's not just about being sad though, it's more about feeling anything less than desirable and getting beyond it.

Here's a little quiz and bear with me it will seem a little silly in some places, but I think anyone reading this list will see a little bit of themselves and give a little more thought in the future. If not that's ok too. I only have control over me and writing this out helps me.

Quiz - Would you rather feel love or hate?
Would you rather feel ease or frustration?
Would you rather feel relief or sadness?
Would you rather feel peace or anger?
Would you rather feel confident or unsure?
Acceptance or resistance?
Joy or Irritation?
Satisfaction or unsettled?
Elation or despair?
Laughter or tears?
Freedom or trapped?
Peace or drama?

Anyway, you get the picture and you also may have realized as you were going over that list that you have a choice. You can focus on the things that bring you down or you can focus on the things that lift you up.

Some may say, What in my life is good enough to lift me up? And to that question, I have no answer, because only you can determine what is good enough in your life to lift you up. It is not for me to say, just as it is only for me to decide what it is in my life that lifts me up. Everyone has different values and tolerances, there fore one can really only decided for oneself what will lift them up and only when they are ready.

I've noticed lately that I am not ruffled by the difference of opinion. I appreciate different opinions and different views because it broadens my perspective and causes me to expand. I am not saying that it creates a change in my opinion, but it certainly expands my ability to see things in other ways. It raises my level of compassion and understanding.

I love expanding and growing.

I am my Captain

I love my life and the new direction I have been steering my ship. I have left the dock and I am traveling on safe smooth waters. Everyone on my ship is a cooperative component and headed in the same direction as me. It just seems like anyone that wants to travel in a different direction, in a different manner or at a different speed is some how finding their way off my ship. I am so pleased to be blissfully drifting with ease in the exact right place at the exact right time. Everything I ever wanted is all lining up in perfect alignment simply because I am tending to my alignment.

Tending fires that fuel true happiness.

I know my way to 9

I have never heard it explained any more simple than this,... "There is more than one way to get to nine. You could go, 8 + 1, then there's the 4 + 5 option, you could even go the 3 + 6 route." And none of those even take into account all the negative numbers plus positive numbers that would get you to the number 9.

What's the point? There's always a point, right? The point is, if the objective is for all of us to get to the same place, in this example the #9, do you really care how I get to 9, as long as it doesn't affect you getting to 9.

Now simply replace the #9 with the word happiness. I'll get to happiness my way and you do it your way. That way we both win.

Hmmm,... That's very interesting.

What an amazing realization I've had today!!!

Try to guess what I'm going to do. Guess! C'mon,... just guess. Ok, I'll tell you. Here's what I'm going to do. I am going to share this realization with you. Yes, I am because that's just the KIND of person that I AM. Before, I might just blurt out this amazing realization, but today I am going to preface it with a disclaimer and I'll explain why.

Have you ever been explaining something to someone and they respond to you repeatedly during the conversation with, "I know" or "Yes, I know,... but"? Like when you tell your friend, "Your boyfriend is mistreating you. You deserve better. You have a choice. You can draw a line in the sand" and he or she says, "I know, but if I,... blah blah blah then maybe he'll see how much I love him". This response is the perfect example of someone saying I know, but actions speak louder than words. You SAY 'I know" your actions holler out, "I have no idea what I am doing and why this KEEPS happening". The difference is "knowing" something and "living" something. Knowing is a totally different thing all together than living.

The reason I provided this example is because the amazing realization that I had today is one of those things for me. I have been knowing what I am about to share with you and I've been spouting off about it for a good long time, however I felt a huge shift in my awareness today like the knowledge sunk in deeper and with this shift I vow to myself to LIVE the realization. You're dying to know what it is, aren't you? I know, hee hee

The amazing realization I had today was this, I have been given a gift. That gift is this day. What will I do with this gift? I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to enjoy it. I am going to enjoy it no matter what the external conditions include. I know we've all heard it before, Today is a gift, that is why we call it the present. BUT in the past I knew it. Yeah yeah, I know! (dismissively)

Today I will LIVE it!!! Today and every day for the rest of my life. My day, my choice, my gift, my happiness. The totally cool thing about this is, if you are reading this right now, you have been given this gift too. Your gift, your day, your choice. What will you do with yours?

I recommend a celebration. Celebrate you! Celebrate your ability to make a choice. Celebrate your decision to celebrate. Dance around and get giddy. If you don't like it, that's ok, IT IS your choice.

Happy Fourth of July everyone!!!

One, Two, Three! Go for it!!!

Sometimes we find ourselves in a place in our lives when we are looking at what is going on and we slow down long enough to really look at what is going on and we have to ask ourselves, What's in it for me?

We can tolerate toxic relationships for a long time for the sake of a relationship or for the sake of the precieved good and then one day we lift our heads up from the grind stone of dealing with life and it's circumstances and that question comes up again, What's in it for me?

If you find yourself asking yourself this question of a fairly regular basis, my advice would be to develope an exit plan. Don't over think it, count to 3 and do it!

It really can be that simple

Sitting in my writing chair today and trying to get to a place of still mind enough to begin writing. I've got my head phones on and I am so busy scanning my brain for a point of positive focus that I could not even hear the words streaming into my ears. It took me about 2 and a half minutes to slow my thoughts long enough to realize that Kool and the Gang was on and were singing directly into my ears these exact words: Cherish the love we have, We should cherish the life we live. Cherish the love. Cherish the life.

Search no more. Right?

It is all very simple. Cherish the love. Cherish the life. You get to decide what that means for you.

Momma Pie, I love your guts

I had the most amazing conversation with my mom yesterday. We talked about our growth, individual and in our relationship with each other. We shared pictures via text, we laughed, we reflected, and you know what,... we grew a little more.

We have had our trying times for sure especially the decade of my life from about 14 to 24. We resisted each other and we agonised over our relationship. We wanted things from each other we thought we might not be able to have and with diligent effort as individuals we worked on ourselves and on our relationship together.

This was not the first time we talked about her decision to have an only child. I know, as I said to her yesterday, the logic behind her decision and found that I agreed with her logic enough to have an only child myself. It can be a difficult decision, because you want your child to have the very best of everything and you have to decide for yourself what that means to you.

Some people decide that it means having an only child and devoting 100% of their parenting attention to a single child and denying them the opportunity to have a sibling and for others it means dividing their attention amongst multiple children and provide siblings. I realize this is only one perspective on one factor of decisions that are made regarding becoming a parent and everyone has their own reasons for their choices. Whatever we decide for ourselves, we have to come to the realization within ourselves that we simply do the best we can from any given point and move on.

I have yearned for the better part of my life for a sibling. I've said many times that my cousins and very close friends are "kinda" like my siblings, but it is just not the same. I am an only child. I never will have a sibling that shares my mother and my father.

Yesterday during my wonderful conversation with my sweet momma with all the love, devotion, energy and acceptance she pours into me and our relationship I decided to say FUCK IT to that hole in my soul that yearns for a sibling. I am DAMN lucky and very grateful to have such an amazing relationship with my mom. I vowed to her from that conversation forward I would no longer ache for a sibling. I have many things to be grateful for and it seems no matter what yard you're in when you are focusing on what your life lacks the grass will always be greener in the other yard.

[caption id="" align="alignleft" width="300"] This was taken about 6 years ago in Laurelhurst Park. I made arrangements for us to have a photo shoot on one of my moms visits to Portland, she lives in the midwest.[/caption]

My mom and I have a very special relationship. We have a connection that goes beyond the earthly realm. It's difficult to explain, but she knows it's there and so do I and that is all that matters. The grass in my yard with this attitude of gratitude is emerald-green.

Thank you Momma for everything you have done and sacrificed for me. You are the best!!!

Yes! You have a choice.

I had the opportunity to spend some time with the Goodnesses this last Friday. Who are the Goodnesses? and Why do I call them the Goodnesses? I knew you were wondering so, I just thought I'd facilitate those questions for you. The Goodnesses are one of my very best friends little girls. Their names are Lexi who is 3 years old and Taylor, who'll be two in July.

Calling them The Goodnesses evolved from when Lexi was a baby. Every time Shanna would show someone her picture they would say, "Oh my goodness" and proceed with various forms of oohing and aahing about how adorable she was and still is. Naturally, Shanna began to call Lexi, "My Goodness" and when Taylor came along we had MG and MG2. So, in short I just started referring to them as The Goodnesses. See?

Why am I telling you about The Goodnesses? Good question. I did have a reason for bringing them up, so let's begin. After we had been playing at the PlayDate PDX indoor park, we went back to Shanna's house and the girls took their naps. Shanna had some errands to run, so I stayed at the house with the sleepy girls. Taylor was the first to wake up and she was hungry. I placed her in her high chair and got out the food Shanna had prepared for just such a situation. She had grapes cut into halves, chicken, cheese and tomatoes all cut into Taylor bite sized pieces. I got her a sippy cup with some water and we were sitting there face to face as she was eating.

We were playing the, let me tell what each bite I take is going to be game. Chicken? Yes, that's chicken. Gapes? Yes, you're eating grapes. She was laughing and it as completely adorable. Then she picked up her sippy cup for a drink and there are two places in the high chair tray to hold a cup. When she sat the cup down she placed it in the other cup holder.

She looked up at me inquisitively, as if she were checking in with me to see if it was ok to place the cup in a different place. I reassured her that it was fine and realized this was the perfect opportunity to introduce the concept that she has a choice. I said, Look at that Taylor you have options, as I pointed to the two cup holders in her tray. I pointed to one and said, Here's an option and then pointed to the other and said, here's another option. Then I asked can you say, I have a choice? She said it!!!

In her cute little abbreviated version she said, "I ava chce." Why does that thrill me so much? I'll tell you why!!! It is just the beginning for her to realize that she has choices in life and a little reminder for the rest of us. Whether we are trying to decide where to set our drinking glass or what we want to focus our feelings on today, we have a choice.

Life is tough and full of ups and downs. There are plenty of reasons to be sad, disappointed, hurt or angry and a myriad of other negative feelings, but how does it make you FEEL to be focused on the negative? I feel like it sucks!!! I don't like to feel down. Luckily, I have a choice and I am aware.

Teaching Taylor that she has a choice, even if it's only where to set her cup for now, in the long run, will be a tremendous coping skill in her life. Being aware of having a choice empowers you to take your life experience to the next level and the next and the next.

Relive to tell, is it really worth it?

Reliving the details of an event or situation that caused frustration initially,...Does it serve you? That is the ultimate question.

If reliving it serves you, in a manner of assisting clarity to transcend the event or situation, then yes, relive it. Work it through. Process it and change your perspective on reality, but if reliving it only creates more frustration and feelings of dis ease, then for gods sake, stop it!

This is a good question that I will be asking myself in the future. Does this serve me? How am I going to benefit from the retelling of this situation that was so frustrating to me that just talking about it gets me really upset again?

If we find ourselves retelling a story over and over again that created a great deal of stress in the first place we could use it as a reminder to, pause and evaluate for ourselves, is it really worth it?

Everything's gonna be alright

You know that moment when you are right in the middle of a panic and you can't feel your feet?

It's sorta like your breathing gets to going so rapidly, the circulation to your extremities slows to a point of no feeling. You almost have this feeling that everything is going to be ok, if only this one thing would just work out.

I had this feeling a couple weeks ago at the grocery store. I had recently gotten a new wallet for my purse, so I had reorganized everything in a way that seemed to make sense at the time, but once I was standing in the check out line all that sense went right out the window.

I was frantically looking for my debit card to pay for my groceries and I KNEW that it was in there somewhere, I just could not find it. The panic feeling was not helping me find it, so I took a few deep breaths and told myself, it will be just fine. You know your debit card is in here somewhere. The deep breaths helped me feel my feet again and what do you know I was able to find my debit card.

It was in a place that seemed totally logical. What do you know? I'm not crazy after all. The cashier was totally identifying with me and she was the one that mentioned the feeling of not bring able to feel her feet. It was spot on and as soon as she said that my awareness shifted and that is when I started taking the deep breaths and I calmed down.

It's amazing sometimes how the very simple words of one person can have such a profound affect on someone else and that concept right there is the main reason why I write this blog.

I want people to be aware that they have the power to change their lives. I want people to know that they can choose a more peaceful life. I want people to feel all the love there is to feel around them and more importantly within them. I want people to feel empowered. Don't get me wrong I benefit a great deal from all the writing and introspective work I do for this blog. This blog provides for me a huge sense of empowerment. All the things I write about are really a higher wisdom in myself that I allow to flow through me and I am learning as I am writing. In fact, I am a subscriber to my own blog.

When I write about something, the post usually goes out a few days later and sometimes even as much as a couple weeks later. So, time passes and with experience even just a couple of days worth of experiences my perspective changes. When I get up in the morning, the very first thing I do is, I read my blog. I surprise myself sometimes. I wonder where the hell did that clarity come from and I guess the answer is, from a higher wisdom.

A wisdom that knows beyond a shadow of a doubt that everything is going to be ok, even if for a moment I can't feel my feet. It will all be ok.

Just eat the damn thing!!!

We are faced with all sorts of challenges in our lives. Some are heavy deep rooted challenges that require introspection and a great deal of courage to actively seek assistance from an outside unbiased source. This unbiased outside source is hopefully trained and can help us unravel the knots that these deep rooted challenges can create in our lives.

Sometimes our challenges are lighter and less serious, but still plague us with the frustrations of being unresolved. Even though we've given it our best and feel like we have truly conquered them, those pesky little bastards keep popping back up.

For me one of those little challenges,...BIG, HEAVY, SIGH,....is salty savory foods. I know it will not be good for me even though it tastes really really good. I have to say I am pretty good at not giving in to these cravings, but sometimes it just gets to be overwhelming and I go out and buy a fried chicken leg, oh and usually some jojos. I know, I know. I'm hard enough on myself, so please just hold on to those judgements and comments, but I just love salty savory things (she said under her breath with a slightly exasperated whine).

I'm just happy that when I do finally break down after weeks, sometimes months and actually go to a deli for that one piece of chicken and jojos, I am able to order such a small piece and only 3 jojos. I do get some weird looks from the deli clerk when I order 3 jojos, bit it beats the hell out of eating a bucket of chicken and a whole order of French fries (which I have never done regarding the bucket) and it totally works for me. So, yes, every once in awhile I just eat the damn chicken and for those of you that crave sweets, just eat the damn cupcake, once in awhile.

I used to indulge in these cravings all the time because I thought I was a healthy person. I would say to myself, I can have French fries for shit sake, I did my workout this morning! Then I heard somewhere along the way that being healthy or fit was 80% eating healthy and 20% working out.

SHIT!!! I was sabotaging myself every single day. Every bust ass work out I did, I learned, was not earning me a ticket to the smorgasbord of fast food and junkies that are so readily available. It did take me awhile to learn this lesson and I still have to fight for my fitness. I fight for it by working out and making moment by moment decisions about food and BEER.

One day though when I wasn't looking someone brought some treats to my office and I thought to myself, "Who's the son of a bitch that brought this crap here to tempt me?" And almost immediately as if someone else was answering my question, I thought to myself, "Well, who's the son of a bitch that's putting it in your mouth?"

Oh,...yeah,....

That!!! is when the moment by moment decisions began.

So, whether your challenges are deep rooted and heavy or lighter and less serious, I guess what it boils down to is, who's the son of a bitch that is making the decisions in your life? Who is the one in charge? Who is taking action? Not making a decision or taking action is a decision, but is that getting you what you really want? Are you choosing to be a victim of outside circumstances?

I challenge you to take control. You have the power to make things happen. You have the power to make improvements in your life and that power is in the choices you make. Is your happiness worth it to you?

Grocery cart

I don't understand why some people don't return their grocery carts at the grocery store. I see these carts left all over the parking lot and sometimes they are rolling straight towards someone's car or blocking a parking spot. I really do try to give people the benefit of the doubt, such as maybe they are in pain and returning the cart is just too much for them, or maybe they are going through some difficult time and its all they can do to muster up the energy to take care of themselves, but sometimes it just seems like laziness and a lack of consideration. Don't you think if you can get the cart you could return the cart? Usually the grocery stores provide multiple cart returns right in the the parking lot.

I know this is pretty petty, but since I've brought it up I might as well get it all out. When a cart is returned, how hard would it be to push the cart into the cart that is already there? It's just a simple little consideration for the people that work at the grocery store and for other people that return their carts. More carts can be stored in the cart return if they are properly placed.

Another little grocery store annoyance of mine is when using the recycling machines, if you experience a malfunction, why can't you simply push the service button to request help before just moving over to the next machine? There are other people that use these recycling machines and in fact are waiting in line to use the next available machine and you just jammed one up and stepped over to the next machine without even pushing the damn service button. That is so inconsiderate and rude.

I have a pretty good idea that it is unreasonable for me to expect other people to have the same values as me, but this is so simple.

Ok, now, I realize I am judging others on their actions or lack of actions in these cases and if you knew me you'd know I am a pretty positive upbeat person, but the key word there is person. I am a flawed human being doing the best I can with my current level of awareness and damn it, I guess that is what all those other people are doing as well.

My choices are to let it go and happily continue my efforts in returning abandoned carts or move to Canada.

Seriously! In Canada they have all their grocery carts stored in a coin operated locking device. When you get a cart you pay a 25cent deposit and when you return the cart you get your quarter back.

I'm not moving to Canada for 25cents, but I wouldn't mind if people thought twice about leaving their carts in the parking lot,...

Zombie Zen Master

It is my intention to live my dream of being an inspirational person. This blog is a huge piece of my dream.

Inspiration is my passion and the connections I create when I am inspired make me feel like I am truly living my life on purpose. As Abraham would say, "I am tuned in, tapped in and turned on" by the idea of living my life on fire with purpose.

I see people walking around like Zombies. They think they are living their lives, but they aren't. They are going through the motions of living and merely existing. Existing in one miserable moment until the next. Yearning for the time when they can escape their misery.

I want to shake their little zombie bodies until the heads fall off and then hold their head in my hands, look them square in the eyes and ask them, WHY? Why do you choose misery and suffering when you have a choice? Breathe,....

Then I take a deep breath,...(breathe) and I put down their little imaginary zombie head because I can see they are my zombie zen masters, reminding me to accept.

Acceptance is the key and I am here to make me happy. Oh yeah,... it's beginning to sink in.

I intend to balance this passion for living inspired with the other very important areas of my life such as my personal relationships, my physical fitness and my spiritual connection.

I intend to live on fire with purpose in harmony, health and abundance.